"Our thinking and our behaviour are always in anticipation of aresponse. It is therefore fear-based."

It had been a while since the pirates had visited the house, not because the boys had been misbehaving but because we're saving for something (all will be revealed). The boys have been so good and we thought they deserved a mini treat. For those of you that don't know where our name came from, this ones for you.

We Introduced the pirates in to our daily life to keep Seth's behaviour at a level you expect from your child and to reward him for being a great kid. He's never been a naughty child but he did go through a phase of throwing some pretty immense temper tantrums. To be fair I put a lot of it down to the transition of having his life split in two and going from house to house.

The pirates watch the boys all the time, much the same as Santa who watches them at home through the light fixtures (quite a creepy thought really). The pirates though watch the boys EVERYWHERE. When they have a good run of excellent behaviour or they do something especially great they are rewarded and this can happen anywhere. When Seth was ill in hospital the pirates visited and left him something in his room. they leave things in his car seat when hes had a great parents evening. They've even been known to leave gifts on benches in parks.

When were at home and the pirates have been, the boys hear the sound of waves crashing against the beach (good old white noise app on the iPhone) and they excitedly search the house looking for their message.

The pirates have become a big part of our lives, even more so with the blog being started.  What's nice is that all the excitement Seth has already had from it Opeie is now just starting to understand. Seth and Opeie are great children, thoughtful and caring. The way we bring them up has everything to do with that and the time and effort we make with them has been important to their development. It's nice to think that those pirates in the sky have a little influence on that though too.

"A man's manners are a mirror in which he shows his portrait."

Every day I'm feeling more and more obsolete, Opeie is becoming so independent that at times like this I'm at a bit of a loose end, it's good for the writing though especially on days like today as Opeie runs about the soft play area desperately trying to befriend everyone he comes in to contact with. He does say 'come on daddy' every now and again but once i start following him he's off again happily talking to other children.

Opeie is such a loving and thoughtful little boy for his age and people always comment on his politeness and manners when we are out and about. As I sit here writing this I can hear Opeie saying 'what's your name? I'm Opeie (or Hopeie as he pronounces it). Opeie clearly needs to be around children his own age more now so (despite it being very upsetting because i makes us even more aware how quickly the time has gone) we've started looking at nurseries. 

It's great when were out and he talks to new children but some of them like a little boy today can be really quite mean. Today Opeie met two boys (cousins), Charlie, a sweet little boy around Opeie's age, happy to just be running about and William, a child I can only describe as a spoilt little brat with a terrible attitude who was probably a year older.  This little monster got the hump because his cousin wanted to play with Opeie so started saying things like 'go away' 'we don't want to play with you' and 'stop following us' he even tried to block Opeie's way out of spite. Opeie doesn't understand thankfully and was happy just running about but honestly I just wanted to trip the little monster over.

Kids at the age of 3 and under shouldn't be like this. They are supposed to be innocent and want to be friends with everyone they meet. What annoyed me more was the mom could hear her son yet said nothing, she seemed like quite a well to do woman as well. Apart from me telling the boy that I thought he was very rude and shouldn't talk to people like that I managed to bite my tongue. The last time we were at this soft play area I told a boy off for purposely pushing Opeie over with quite an aggressive look on his face. To be fair though the dad dragged his son out of the place and wouldn't even look me in the face. It's not my place to correct other people's children but if their parents can't be bothered I'm not having anyone be abusive to my boy. If I heard Seth or Opeie talking to anyone like that I would be devastated, but they have been brought up to show respect.

Opeie started to look tired and i was needed once more for cuddles (good to know i still have some uses), my very sweaty haired boy needed some sleep. I may be needed less and less as the days go by, he makes it clear he can brush his own teeth, feed himself and put his own shoes on but I will always be there to protect him and fight his corner, were a team and I'll always have his back, no matter what.