"It's an ongoing joy being a dad."

Opeie gets more and more adorable each week. When he was a baby I loved the way he would smile at me and reach out to touch my face. When he learned to talk, the words 'I Love you Daddy' hit me like a crazy wave of emotions (and still do). Now that he can write himself, his latest addition to his adorableness, is leaving me little notes about. I had hoped it for so many years, but I never actually realised that being a dad would be this amazing. I feel so lucky every day

 

"Being a father, being a friend, those are the things that make me feel successful."

I'm not usually a fan of being woken up early in the morning before I'm ready to get out of bed. For the last 6 and a half years though it has pretty much become the norm. Becoming a father means giving up many of the luxuries that you become quite accustomed to over the years, which doesn't sound great, but what you get in its place is a sense of purpose and an unconditional love that you could never get anywhere else. Becoming a dad for me was my defining moment, and from that moment I felt like my life had finally started and everything about this new path was glowing.

Every day feels like fathers day to me and being the stay at home parent makes me feel like that even more. Yesterday as I was woken by the usual "Daaaaaaad" it seemed like the start of every other amazing family morning but this time, there was an extra pitch of excitement in Opeie's voice and he wanted me awake right away because he had something very important he wanted to give me. Walking through the house and seeing colourful decorations everywhere and handmade cards are going to make any doting father feel very special.

Yesterday as always was a great day and that amazing little boy of mine that fills my world with complete happiness yet again reinforced the importance of having a loving and caring family around me. It was a shame that Seth wasn't there too but we have more than made up for it after school today by starting a new project so we can spend some quality creative time together. 

The only thing that did get me a little down yesterday was thinking about my own dad and how disappointed I am that he let our relationship go the way that it did. We're on different paths now but I will always hope that he is happy. Becoming a parent isn't something you go into lightly, you have to make an enormous amount of effort every day to make sure your children develop in the happy and content way that they should. I can go to sleep every night knowing that I have done everything I can to show them how much I adore them both and how proud I am of the little gents they've become.

Happy belated fathers day to all you amazing dads out there!

"Wingediet: When you eat nothing but Giraffe wings!"

It's my favourite time of year again and despite the attempted wake up call at 5am yesterday, i loved being woken up by two excited boys eager to dish out the fruits of their artistic labour. The boys have been secretly working on cards and i love the excitement in the air on the build up to fathers day. I used to like all the secrecy myself when i was growing up. It does make me feel a little sad now though that my own dad has failed to step up and make the effort over the years. 

Anyway, yesterday was awesome, a relaxing day playing with the boys and taking time to spend quality time with them is what fathers day is all about. They make me feel like the luckiest dad on the planet and Seth especially has been the cutest. Being a step dad can be difficult at times but hardships aside my relationship with Seth has blossomed over the years.

What i love about Seth and Opeie is how they fully appreciate what me and Mrs M do for them. They are thoughtful and caring boys and everyone comments on how lovely they both are.

(Opeie shamelessly revealed my true age on this card, I'm still looking good for it though)

Fathers day ended with a family game of scrabble which left us all in hysterics when Seth attempted to play 'iet' off of 'winged'. The word was crazy enough but it was followed by a very sleepy Mrs M explaining that a 'wingediet' is when you eat nothing but Giraffe wings, she's a crazy woman! A great end to a fun day with my special boys.

I hope you all had an amazing fathers day.



 

For me, every day is like fathers day.

Fathers day is my favourite time of year, not because i crave the attention, i get all the daddy attention i need every day, but because its a day that celebrates everything i hold dearest to me. Being a dad has completely changed my perspective on life and it is bettering me as a person more and more as the days go by. After craving children for so many years it so lovely to feel like I'm exactly where i am supposed to be now. it is lovely also to wake up to Opeie though waving a card he has made and shouting 'happy daddies day'.

This year Opeie's card was me if i was an Octonaut.

The card was brought to me in a box made of Duplo that lasted about 20 seconds before crumbling before my eyes, bless his wobbly hands. And a special gift inside a Custom Lego box which also put a big smile on my face especially when Mrs M informed me that it took her an hour and a half to make. 

I feel like the luckiest guy on the plane, I hope all you dads out there had an amazing fathers day.

"Maybe Christmas . . . perhaps . . . means a little bit more!"

It takes a very creative person to see something interesting in nothing. Yesterday while Opeie was playing with his toys on the floor in the lounge he suddenly got very excited and began to repeat the word 'Christmas'. Not having a clue what he was going on about and thinking it was part of some game he was playing i briefly left him to it. The 'Christmas's' got louder and it was soon clear that i needed to get on the floor and see what had got my boy so excited.

Opeie was pointing under the dining table, 'Christmas, Christmas', but there was nothing under the table? could he mean the legs look like candy canes? did the nuts and bolts under the chairs remind him of sparkly Christmas lights? I had no idea and felt really guilty as Opeie was adamant that 'Christmas' was underneath our dining room table. "Am i going mad? what am i missing?".

Its situations like this that make me realise how differently we view things than our children. Out of pure frustration of daddy clearly being so slow Opeie crawled under the table and pointed at exactly what he was trying to get across. On the wall under the table there was a piece of plaster missing off the wall and what did it look like? what was it that daddy and his lack of imagination couldn't see without being told by his creative two year old boy? Clear as day there was father Christmas staring back at us. A simple thing of insignificance, A Defect and Opeie made it beautiful. Children are amazing and I'm so jealous of his innocence, i don't ever want him to grow up.

Ho Ho Ho!

"It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father."

 Fathers day is obviously one of my favourite days of the year, not because i love gifts or being made a fuss of but because being a dad is what takes up all of my time, my family is the most important thing to me and having a day where that is celebrated is lovely. To be honest though everyday is like fathers day really, i am rewarded daily by two beautiful children who never cease to surprise me with how loving, thoughtful and intelligent they both are and a fiance that treats me like a princess and shows me every day how much she loves me. What more could a boy ask for?

Yesterday i was woken by Mrs M and Opeie who was clutching a beautiful card that they had made for me. It was 6am and because of not going to bed till 1am last night because i was playing with Lego i was shattered. I couldn't get my eyes to focus to read the card so Mrs M kindly ready for me. I love home made cards from the boys and this one was amazing with a Dr Seuss origami shirt and tie on the front (clever) and Opeie's trademark drawn round hands which he loves doing, in keeping with the Seuss theme there was a Seussian rhyme inside.

Mrs M and the boys had also brought me some Dr Seuss books that I'd not seen before for our collection which was really thoughtful and will keep me occupied for a while.

There was one more gift and Mrs M was beyond excited about giving it to me (she's so cute). I had no idea what it was but it put a huge smile on my face. Mrs M had found me a limited edition Dr Seuss print 'P for Papa', I love it obviously for what it is/says but also because the image is taken from the Seuss ABC book which was the first Dr Seuss book i read to Opeie, I can't wait to get it framed and on the wall it's going to look amazing.

I had such a great day which of course was made better when Seth came home, we had really missed him this weekend. Seth said he really loves me and wishes there was a stepdad day which i thought was really sweet. There was a lovely end to the day when we got to spend the afternoon with more people that i love being around, Mrs M's Mom and Dad.

I thought today about my friends Danni and Dave who have just had a little boy and Andy and Sarah who have just had a little girl, i bet its really exciting for them having their first Fathers day, i remember how i felt last year it was such a great feeling (if you remember the post last year).

I feel so lucky everyday for the amazing family i have, there's so many dads out there that don't want to make any effort with their children (mine included), they don't know what they are missing. I give my boys everything i am but i get so much more in return, they are my best friends and are a permanent reminder of the man i was always meant to be.

"The blog in its entirety is sincere, heartfelt and utterly colourful. His passion for parenting, and indeed his total admiration for his children, is felt at all times..."

I really don't use our Twitter account as much as i should, If I'm honest i think its a bit lost on me. I'm not on the computer much, In fact i pretty much come on to write my posts and that's it. Id much rather be playing with the boys or of an evening doing lovely things for them ready for the following day. (despite this please add me if you are on Twitter @pirategifts), Tonight though was one of those rare occasions that i clicked on the Twitter logo in my bookmarks toolbar and I'm glad i did. I received this unexpected tweet from itsmygeneration.co.uk.

Its always nice to hear what people think of the blog, I know its loved by family and friends and most importantly the boys but when i get a message like this it really puts a smile on this daddy's face. The write up about the blog is beautifully written and I'm genuinely touched to be included with the other four writers. It's also lovely to know that the blog comes across the way i want it to (you cant always tell being the writer).

Thanks itsmygeneration.co.uk you've really made my evening and the boys will be very happy when they wake up tomorrow. To read the article please click the link below.

http://www.itsmygeneration.co.uk/the-blog/our-top-5-dad-blogs-this-week/

"We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone"

 I haven't written one of my waiting in the car posts for a while and now I find myself parked outside the supermarket with that little cutie asleep in the back. Recently I have found that time on my own as brief as it is has been a bit grim, my mind wanders to thoughts of people that have let me down in the past. I do everything in my power to make sure that the boys are happy, the main reason being... well I'm a dad what dad doesn't want to see a big smile on his children's faces! But a small fraction of it is to make up for my own relatives who have turned out to be a huge disappointment. I tend to hear "you can't chose your family' quite a lot, but can you imagine if you had that option, being in a position where you wouldn't actually choose a single one of your apparent family members? 

I've come to realise over the last 2 years that in regards to my relations I am all alone. I like to think that despite this I embrace my situation. It means all that love and attention that I was spreading about isn't wasted, I can concentrate on the important people, the people that appreciate me and want to be a part of my family. I'm thankful for them and they are the reason I smile 99% of the time. I honestly don't know how i'd cope without the boys and that beautiful lady of mine. Coming to terms with the reality of things was hard, no one wants to admit that their family members have no consideration for them, but I know my life is better without them and is moving forward and blossoming the way it should.

So why is it that on these rare occasions that I am alone my mind wanders. I'm not angry, I'm not really upset I just feel low? I guess that over the years i have expected far to much of these people and was innevitably setting myself up for a fall. how hard is it for people to just be nice? I didn't really want to write anything negative on the blog and i certainly didn't want this to come across as a rant but as its for the boys to read when their older I think it's important for them to know how I have been moulded into the father that I am. I take having a family very seriously and I would give them boys everything I had. I will never give them reason to be disappointed in me.

Playing with your children... "unless you're a moron, why wouldn't you get bored?"

Nothing on the internet has made me angry until today, there's so much rubbish about to read but it can all be taken with a pinch of salt. I love writing the blog but I don't tend to sit on the computer for hours reading articles and posts that don't draw me in straight away. My friend Alice from bigmilkthing sent me this article and even though I'm a really laid back guy that doesn't let anything get to me, this made my blood boil and I am really disappointed that someone like parentdish would publish it. First the article:

(click the link below)

 

Why playing with your children can be (whisper it) a little bit boring

I was limited to 3000 characters in the comment box so I thought something like this needed to be put in to a post as it is relevant to blog and what I'm all about as a parent, so here is my (extended response).

When i found out me and my partner were expecting our first child I knew that I wanted my son to completely adore me, I mean what father wouldn't? i didn't have a great relationship with my own father growing up and I didn't want that for me and my children. I have a step son from my partners previous relationship who on a daily basis tells me that I am his best friend and am also his favourite person to play with, this isn't because he is shy and he doesn't have issues talking to other children, he is a very outgoing child.. This has nothing to do with me being a 'moron' and I'm not even sure what 'obsessed parents' is supposed to mean? 

 The problem isn't that your children are boring its that firstly most parents seem to have no idea how to talk or communicate at all to their children, you don't have to talk to them in baby talk or act like an idiot. Just talk to them like adults and if they don't understand what your saying then explain what you mean (sadly parents think their lives are to hectic for this level of commitment). The second major issue is that most parents have no imagination and rather than actually listen to what their children are talking about and get involved they would rather make a coffee, put their feet up and apparently watch Jeremy Kyle,  if what i hear on the school playground is anything to go by. 

Try and think back to when you were a child, what did you love to do? My eldest loves hearing stories about all the things I got up to growing up and these stories open up his own imagination. I used to love 'making bases' so how hard is it to take a couple of hours to make a base in the house with some sheets? Lego was a big thing for me when i was younger and I have introduced my boys to this and its something we do together when the weather isn't great and were stuck indoors. My boys love playing dress up and Ive been known to don a Captain America outfit and run around with them playing 'The Avengers', it puts a smile on their faces and if you don't want that as a parent then it says a lot about your parenting skills. 

All it takes is a little effort and some imagination. I play with my boys everyday which is why I started our blog giftsfromthepirates.com as a kind of online diary for them to look back on and also to show other parents that read the blog that spending time with your children is a never ending amount of fun. Your commitment to your children doesn't end at changing nappies, cooking food and bathing etc. I have a feeling that the article was written to make waves and get a response, I'm quite shocked that parentdish have posted such offensive material and to label a parent a moron for wanting to get involved in the development of their child is a ridiculous comment to make. 

Your children want to spend time with you, they want you to interact with them and take an interest in what they are doing, this may not always be the case, these could be the golden years in your time as a parent so you should be making the most of every spare minute you have with them. Yes you have many mundane things to do, we all do but if you communicate with your children and explain that sometimes adults have grown up things to take care of but you still take some time to give them the attention they deserve then they will understand and in time respect you for that. 

Too many parents that I come in to contact with seem to have gone in to the whole parenting thing half arsed. When you decide to have children it is a huge commitment, yes your going to have to watch Children's TV and play with toys but your making them happy, Isn't this the thing you want the most? a happy family and children that want to spend time with you? I cant believe that in the article there were so many ridiculous comments from apparent parents. I'll be honest i just feel sorry for the children as apparently "parts of the business of child-rearing are, frankly, dull.". I could go on and on but i feel that doing so would just make me more and more angry. I love and respect my children, I'm there when their happy, I'm there when their sad and I'm there if they want me to build them a hideout in the back garden and dress up like a super villain. Its all part of being a great parent.

I will agree with one part of the article though the "creaking knees" can be a pain.

Anyway rant over, I'm happy in the fact that I am putting everything I can it to my relationship with my boys.

Pauly (a doting, not obsessed parent)