Tuesday 11 June 2013

The Breast Vs The Car

Being a stay at home dad is amazing but there is one thing that I really struggle with if we are in the house. I find it really difficult to get Opeie to sleep as before Mrs M went back to work 5 days a week he had a set routine. As I went through my usual struggle today it got me thinking of the two main heavyweights in the battle against getting Opeie to sleep. Mrs M has been breast feeding Opeie for quite some time now and those relaxing and homely glands have given her the advantage on getting Opeie to relax and inevitably fall asleep since day one. My choice of weapon... The car. When I typed 'Breast Vs The Car' as the title I knew there was no competition really, who was I kidding. I know that as a male I definitely favour one from the other myself so I completely understand.

When Opeie is tired and goes down for a feed he looks instantly relaxed and comfortable like he's having some sort of out of body experience. Although the car does get him to sleep the continuous head flopping forward or having to go down a road filled with speed bumps can't be great and means that he doesn't get a completely uninterrupted sleep.

Opeie has to be absolutely exhausted to fall asleep in the car yet sometimes the effort that he has to put in to his feeding can do all the work for us getting him to his point of slumber in record time. I know the car is a poor substitute but short of growing breasts myself its all I've got.

There's also the added pain of being left sitting in the car for an hour while he sleeps, although it does mean I get to write on the blog (usually about what I'm staring at and more times than none what's on my mind/troubling me). When Mrs M is done feeding though she can get up and go about her day (how I long for breasts). She also has the added bonus of being able to pop them out wherever we are, fast food and speedy snoozing. Now I'm  not in anyway saying that Mrs M has it easy, feeding has been a struggle over the years and I'm so proud of her for sticking with it, our boy is extremely healthy because of it.

I may be a little jealous of Mrs M's fleshy assets but I'm glad that Opeie is still getting the good stuff from her, I think it's the reason he is so lean. In the meantime I will struggle with Opeie's afternoon naps and will continue to be dependent on the magic powers of my 4 wheeled ally, On that note and perfectly timed the little cherub has just woken up. Excellent off to play again for me.

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